Taking Every Thought Captive

A friend and I have been discussing thought life and how to corrall unruly thoughts that disrupt our fellowship with the Lord. We both knew the verse that tells us to take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ, but I observed that I really didn't know what that looked like in real life, as my thoughts are pretty hard to catch sometimes. 

2 Corinthians 10:4-5 - For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ.

So the Lord decided it was time to give me some real life practice. That or my sin nature created a situation that gave me an opportunity to practice it... But let's not lay blame here... 

I had had a really awful day. All morning, back and forth I went between holding back tears and wanting to kill someone because I couldn't decide which one I wanted to do more... I was driving home tonight thinking, "What a truly crappy day." It was a thought that I had "thunk" countless times during the day. But suddenly, I looked at the beautiful sunset to the left of the highway and wondered if something so beautiful could exist on such a terrible day. It hit me then that maybe I had been thinking a lie all day long. 

Was it really a crappy day? Let's see. (1) One little thing had gone wrong. (2) One little person had been hurtful to me. (3) One little response to that person had been un-Christlike. It wasn't really adding up to the day I had been telling myself it was... I decided to give it a try - capturing that thought and making it behave.

I spoke God's truth over it. "This is the day that the Lord hath made. My loved ones are healthy (my little nephew got a wonderful cancer-free report today!); I have an occupation I love in my teaching; I have a vocation I love in homeschooling my girls; my needs are amply met. On the whole this was a pretty doggone good day. And I shall rejoice and be glad in it."

When I stood the lie against the truth, the lie crumbled away. My attitude didn't magically change. My fatigue didn't disappear (emotional conflict really wipes me out). But the logical part of my brain finally recognized that I had been severely overreacting.

All the way home, I repeated it. This is a good day. The Lord made it, and I'm expected to rejoice in it! Little by little the lie was replaced with truth. I may still need a long hot bath to really believe it in the emotional part of my brain, but I'm on my way (and the bath is running).

Here are the steps that seemed to help this time:

1. Recognize the lie.

2. Make it stand against the truth.

3. Replace it with the truth of God's word.

4. Rehearse the truth enough times to wipe away the residue of the lie.

My Perspective Corner

There is a spot in my house where I go when I need to gain some perspective. When I need to remember not to sweat the small stuff and to recognize how small most of my stuff is, this is where I sit. I thought of calling it my Suck It Up corner, because that's more in line with who I am, but "Perspective" had a nicer ring to it.

It wasn't a place that I created; it was a place that I discovered.

One day, I was sitting at a table in my kitchen sighing dramatically at my stress and frustration about some thing. I happened to glance up and to my left to the colorful painting hanging there. That artwork was painted by a dear friend who had just lost her seventeen year old son in a car accident. She painted it at one of those fellowship and fun sorts of art classes. It was one of her very first outings after the death and funeral of her precious son. She wrote me a dear note thanking me for teaching her son on the back of the frame where the canvas was stretched. (I was teaching his homeschool chemistry class at the time of his death.) The vivid colors and the optimistic subject matter, a vase of whimsical flowers, belie the pain my friend must have been feeling as she painted. My problem seemed a lot smaller in the reflection of this moment of heartache captured in acrylics.

I looked through the open door into the entry way where hangs another reminder of the smallness of my problems. Another gift from a fellow mama--a plate beautifully hand-painted with the text of Philippians 4:13: "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." This is another mama in the midst of hardship that is difficult for me to even imagine. Along with her husband and three children, she is visiting the United States seeking treatment for her husband's pancreatic cancer. One of her daughters is blind, among a number of other serious health issues. She has come to this country with very little English, caring for a very ill husband and daughter, and yet, she has the courage to paint Philippians 4:13 for ME. The same day I received the plate from mom, the daughter, one of my students in a church program, gave me a precious note in Braille, which has become one of my most treasured posessions.

That day, as I sat on that stool in my kitchen, I realized just how insignificant my problems were. I realized the value of perspective and thanked God for placing these two reminders right in front of my eyes where they would be impossible to miss. I made a mental note, and now, when I begin to feel under water with cares, responsibilities, and stresses, I go back to that table, pull up a stool, and put my problems next to these two measuring sticks. It doesn't take too long for my perspective to adjust itself.

I'm so thankful for these two women who, in the midst of their own trials, gifted me with these two objects, which have taken on so much more meaning than they probably intended in the first place.

My A Delectable Education Consultation Experience

Is it possible to love someone you've never actually met? To experience the wisdom of a mentor without sitting under long-term guidance? To receive compassionate advice and correction without feelings of condemnation and judgment? If my A Delectable Education consultation experience was any indication, the answer to all three of the questions is a resounding "Yes!"

I've had several ask how it went and if it was worth it, so I decided to write this post to help you decide whether you should invest in this service by the ladies at A Delectable Education (ADE).

For those who may not know, ADE is a website and podcast dedicated to helping homeschoolers implement the Charlotte Mason educational method. They offer one-on-one telephone consultations that culminate in a written year-long instructional plan personalized to your family's educational needs.

My back story is that I've been plugging along with a Charlotte Mason education in my homeschool for a number of years. It hasn't been a perfect implementation of Miss Mason's teaching (and it probably never will be), but it was "more or less" a CM education. Interestingly, Charlotte had a quote about "more or less" implementing her methods: 

"The reader will say with truth, -- 'I knew all this before and have always acted more or less on these principles'; and I can only point to the unusual results we obtain through adhering not 'more or less,' but strictly to the principles and practices I have indicated." 

Charlotte never intended a more or less implementation of her principles! I recognized that I wanted to move closer to a "perfect" implementation in the coming year (although as a perfectionist, I have to be careful with that word...). So I jumped at the chance to talk one-on-one with Liz, who had used CM's methods for years with her own children and diligently studied Miss Mason's own writings and taught them to others.

The first step in the process is signing up for an appointment for the consultation. You should know that there is typically a several-month wait. There are many mamas who desire this service and only one Liz! So sign up early. The sign-up process asks you a little bit about your family dynamics, your kids, how they learn, any challenges they face, etc. It asks you to rate your number one reason for scheduling a consult. I remember wishing I had those reasons ahead of time, so I could have thought out what was REALLY my first priority. Maybe someone else is scheduling their consultation and can give me those reasons in case it might help somebody else! It also had a section where you could give any other pertinent details. I received an email from Liz shortly thereafter. Her response showed clearly that she had read my specific notes, because she addressed them in the message. It was my first indication that this was going to be a truly personalized process. She gave me the assignment to read Charlotte Mason's Volume 1, Home Education in the days leading up to the consultation. It came at a perfect time for me. I had already read the volume once online, but I had just purchased a physical copy of the volume. I got so much more out of it by reading a physical copy (and am still in the process of finishing it). The personal response also allowed me to send her back a message letting her know that I had second-guessed my primary reason for scheduling the consultation!

The night before the consultation arrived, and despite having fixated on this telephone conversation for MONTHS, I suddenly found that I couldn't remember ANY of my questions that I had been developing! In a panic, I called out to my Charlotte Mason Soiree sisters to help me jog my memory! Many responded that they had already had their consultation and not to worry--that it would be like a conversation with a longtime friend and mentor.

The telephone consultation did not disappoint. I certainly made a friend that day. Liz may never remember the conversation (because she helps so many), but I most definitely will! It was absolutely personalized. Liz asked about books we had already done and substituted books for those. She helped me to decide which forms to put my kids in, based not just on their ages, but on their individual learning aptitudes and challenges. She answered my every question as we went, providing not only a book list but methodological instruction - the how-to of Charlotte's methods. I discovered that I had been doing at least one subject completely wrong! She gave tips of where to combine the girls and where it would be better to give independence (one of the "main reasons" I had requested guidance on). She provided advice on scheduling, both daily and term schedules. As we ended the call, she kindly offered to answer any further questions via email throughout the course of the year. We hung up the phone, and I waited by the computer for my plan to hit my inbox!!!

The day arrived, and I received my invoice, which must be paid before the written plan is released, and then my written plan. It was so personalized! My kids' names were in there; my history spine was selected based on a book I already had on my shelf; our artist selections were chosen to avoid those artists we had already studied; a learning difficulty my youngest has was addressed in the appropriate subject areas. You will not be getting a "form" curriculum plan. I'm sure that there will be similarities among different families' plans, but yours will be tailored to you. The numbered items below are the things that I did to unpack my written plan. If you're not interested in those, just scroll to the end for the final recommendation and a few pieces of advice.

1. Preliminary read-through - no stopping, no note-taking, just familiarizing myself with the format and where to find things I would need later.
2. Mark books I already own - one color pen for these underlines
3. Mark required books I need to purchase - another color pen for these underlines
4. Mark optional books - Several segments of books were of the "choose from this list" variety. For example, a number of history biographies were given. We are to choose one to start, and when that one is finished, we will select another. I marked these separately, so I know that I don't have to buy all of those titles.
5. Annotate scheduling cards - I took my scheduling cards (more on these later) and wrote curriculum details directly on the cards. I wrote book selections, instructional notes, artists for each term, different types of material for recitation, books of the Bible to be covered, etc. on each corresponding scheduling card. The scheduling cards have been a Godsend, but still, scheduling eleventy-million different subjects for three kids is chaotic enough without having to flip back and forth in a multi-page document for the details.
6. Create book list - I opened a spreadsheet and began listing books. Use separate columns for title and author in case you ever need to search, filter, or sort by one or the other! I italicized all books that I already own. The next column denotes whether the book is a Form II book, a Form III book, or a "together" book. The next column includes whether it is a required book or an optional book, and if optional, whether it is a history biography, a historical fiction, or a general fiction free-read. I may go back and add another column for which subject the book applies to if I find that I need that information. I'll use remaining columns to search for the best price on the used books on the internet.

That's how far I've gotten. I've got four tasks before me:

• Book acquisition, prioritizing based on which books are needed earliest in the year, for my budget's sake.
• Scheduling - I've done this enough that it shouldn't be too difficult to put together next year's schedule, although this year, I have the added wrinkle of more independent subjects for my eldest.
• Planning for subjects without books - Most of these are afternoon occupations, which have been sorely lacking in our homeschool lo these many years... So I want to invest some real energy into making this a priority for next year.
• Record-keeping for next year - The written plan was delivered as a Google document that remains available both to me and to the ADE ladies. I plan to highlight what we finish in one color and what we don't finish in another color. I'm giving my poor perfectionist self permission and grace to not execute perfectly! But I do want a record, so when I schedule my consultation next year, we will know what to work on for the future.

So, I guess it's time for the recommendation... It doesn't take a genius to know whether it's a yea or a nay from me... But I can discuss bang for the buck. As far as the buck goes, I'd rather refer you to the ADE website. Just in case they change their hourly rate, it will be best for you to get that information directly from them. The telephone conversation lasted right at two hours, and they billed an additional 45 minutes to complete the written plan. At the current rate, I can say that this is the best financial investment that I have made in our homeschool in a long time.

Before I close, I have three pieces of advice for you. When you schedule your consultation, you'll be impatient about that long wait. But I think you can make it work to your benefit if you'll do these three things in the interim.

1. Read Volume One. You'll be instructed to do that in your confirmation e-mail, but don't let this slide. 10 minutes a day is sufficient. Find a friend (in person or online) who will read along with you and discuss. You'll be more likely to follow through.
2. Buy the scheduling cards. Yes, they're included with the consultation, and yes, everybody wants to save a buck. But at $5 per form, it's absolutely worth it to get the cards ahead of time and practice making a schedule and becoming familiar with that process.
3. Listen to ALL of the A Delectable Education podcasts. You have time between now and then, I promise. And you'll save tons of precious minutes in your telephone consultation if you are already familiar with the concepts. I can't tell you how many times Liz asked me something like, "Do you know the history streams work?" and I was able to reply in the affirmative. That one alone probably saved a half hour of explaining.

In short, or long as the case may be, this is such an amazing service. I hesitated to write such a glowing review because I fear that we may one day overwhelm the ADE ladies with too many consultation requests, and they might have to discontinue the service. But I realized that they are so generous with their time and knowledge, it wouldn't be right to selfishly keep my recommendation to myself. I pray for the Lord to multiply their time or to bring others alongside to scale the service to meet the demand. I am so grateful for what I continue to learn through the podcast and for the firm plan that I have for our homeschool next year!